The number one thing that's holding you back in life right now

Have you ever taken action, put yourself out there, worked hard to achieve your goals and dreams; and fell short? Struck out?

Did you decide to try again? Try something else; tried a new strategy, chased a new dream, shrank your vision to something “realistic” to put the pain of the loss behind you?

Then when it didn't work out multiple times for multiple reasons did you think, “I don't know whether I want to do this again” and you take yourself out of the game.

Or you have stepped up with some courage, and been judged? Did someone make a harsh comment? Was it your family, your friends or your community, and so you chose to play small instead?

Have you ever been unsure and thought, "I'm just not sure if this is going to work? How much more time, effort, energy and money am I going to pour into this?” So you start hedging your bets because you feel uncertain.

Vincent Van Gogh once asked, "What would life be like if we didn't have the courage to attempt anything?"

Bland. Vanilla. Repetitive. Uninspired. That's not the life most people want. They want more from life. More joy, more passion, more experiences, more fun, more of the good things.

Imagine, what if you were a little more bold, a little more direct, showed up with more courage? What would happen if you did that? What would show up in your life?

What if you did take another chance? What if you put yourself out there with a bit more courage and you stepped into that space that you were hedging against right now?

What would that create?

What would that mean?

What would that bring?

What would you experience?

To help you get more courage we're going to talk about the Three Phantom Fears. We all know what holds us back in life?

It's fear.

Fear #1:

Fear of loss.

This is the fear around what we may lose to achieve or gain something else in our lives. We may call it opportunity cost or sacrifice, but essentially it is the fear of losing something we already have and have grown accustomed to.

For example, a lot of people value health. They want to be healthy, and that requires some work. You've got to eat the salmon, the salad, the quinoa, the kale. You can't eat the burgers, the chips, the chocolate or cakes or whatever else you may comfort yourself with.

And so there is this pain around, "If I'm going to do this and I'm going to succeed at this, what's my loss? What am I losing out on here? I know there's all this great stuff, but there's stuff that I'm not going to be able to do any more."

And whether or not it's food, or whether it's career or relationship, this plays on the mind, "What's my opportunity cost? What's my loss in this situation?"

That's the fear of loss. Have you ever experienced that before in your life?

Has that been holding you back?

Fear #2:

Fear of the process.

This is the fear of going through the sometimes difficult or challenging action to get what you want. We call this "the fear of hard work".

For instance, you want to be healthy. That means you've got to get up. You've got to go to the gym. You've got to do the work, whether that's cardio, high intensity weights or resistance training.

You’ve got to get up when it's cold and wet and stormy? Sometimes your brain resists - That's just hard work!!

Has that ever challenged you? The thoughts, "Oh my God, even the idea of doing that sounds so hard." It could be health or learning the new marketing techniques you need, or working out some technical details or learn a new skill or tool. There is process pain here.

Fear #3:

Fear of the Outcome.

This is being fearful about the result - of stepping up, taking all of that action, making it happen and still not getting what you want. What if I go through the fear of loss. What if I go through the fear of process and I get my outcome and it's not what I think it is?

Or not what I wanted it to be?

I don't get the outcome that I wanted. That I expected. It's less than or different to what I expected. The worst part about this type of loss is you're playing games in your head. These are all imagined circumstances.  

You're stopping yourself from even starting because you haven't gone through the loss pain and the process pain yet. You may never even experience those! However, you're deciding that it may not be worth it because you don't have a guarantee what your outcome will be.

These are the Three Phantom Fearsthat are holding us back. It is important that you have a look at your life. Have a look at where you are taking action and where you are holding back or avoiding. Work out which of these phantoms is haunting you and become aware of where and how they are showing up in your life. Awareness is the first step. Once we're aware, the fear loses its power and we can start to forge ahead to achieve our goals without these unconscious blocks.

If you need greater support, or are looking for a better, faster way to get ahead, reach out to us and let’s start a conversation. 

Remember, for your best life:

Seek Clarity

Step Forward with Courage

Stay Consistent